Skip to main content

When You See Me, What Does My Body Say?

     Tattoos.  Piercings.  Wigs.  Weaves.  Hair dyes.  Colored contact lenses.  Shades.  Suits.  Stilettos.  Excess weight.  Muscles.  Gold teeth.  Sagging pants.  Dreadlocks.  Afros.  Cornrows.  Diamonds.  Perfumes.  Body odor.  Halitosis.  Plunging necklines.  Thigh-high skirts.  Blonde hair.  Scars.  Cigarettes.  Stained teeth.  Shirt & tie.  Creased jeans.  Polished shoes.  A frown.  A smile.  A hoodie.  Sleeveless denim vests.  Ripped jeans.  Trimmed beard.  Toned body.  Heavy makeup.  Plain.  Eclectic.  Vibrant.  Drab.
     Any of these can be found on any human being every day all day long.  When we see it, we immediately make an assessment of the individual.  Positive, negative and neutral, we think we have people figured out to some degree when we see them.  A young person with violet hair and a tongue piercing may make a baby boomer shake her head.  A young African American male with sagging pants and a gold grille in his mouth may cause a police officer to slow down and watch intently on his patrol.  A middle-aged woman with a toned and trim body could spike interest from a man who thinks she believes in taking good care of herself.  Without uttering a word, a body and its upkeep say a lot to onlookers.  It's not always about your facial expressions or posture.  It is also about how you present your physical appearance that says more about who you are.
     We look at people who are well-dressed, polished, groomed and smiling and we say, "They are professional".  We look at a female with a short skirt and cleavage and say, "She's a cheap trick."  We look at a guy with a tailored suit, expensive-smelling cologne, and big diamond pinkie ring and say, "He must be paid well."  What you show is all we know.  We will judge, assume, analyze.  To some degree, we'll be correct in our assessment.  Therefore, if you want people to judge you well, consider what you're saying to them via your body habits.  Enhance your reputation with your swag.  You don't have to look rich or important.  But always consider what your body is saying to others because, ultimately, it's talking about you.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

What It Means to Speak Truth to Power

     "Speaking truth to power" has become a common phrase to use when speaking about truth and/or power in a discussion that encourages courageous discourse on controversial matters.  It is an old phrase coined back in the 1950s by the Quakers and is defined as "a non-violent political tactic, employed by dissidents against the received wisdom or propaganda of governments they regard as oppressive, authoritarian or an ideocracy." (Wikipedia)      I've heard it overused in a lot of ways and not with a clear purpose in its meaning within the context of what was being spoken.  We latch onto certain words and phrases as language goes in and out of style on almost a monthly basis.  In this current generation, there seems to be a new word or phrase created daily and then abandoned when they become overused like worn out sneakers from last year's fall collection.  But words have staying power even if you get tired of hearing the...

A Dozen Ways to Tell Your Boss No

     In basically every training class I do on communications, I get people who are reluctant to manage up.  In a few cases, the direct, decisive communicators establish early on in the relationship their boundaries and preferences to their boss.  Those bosses who can respect other people's limits tend to listen without feeling threatened or disrespected.  But generally, workers tend to treat their superiors as demigods and themselves as powerless servants who shouldn't speak up for fear that they'd be punished for having an opinion or for pushing back in areas where they are overwhelmed or uncomfortable.  I get asked, "What do I do when my manager piles all of this work on me, and I can't get it done by his unreasonable deadlines?"  Among other things like how they manage their time, I usually ask if they've had a discussion with their manager about their workload.  The common response:  "Oh noooo, I can't do that.  He's the b...

How to Stop Interruptions in Conversations

     So you're sitting in a meeting, and you begin to answer a question that has been directed toward you by your boss.  You get through about half of your response when a colleague jumps in and offers his take and essentially silences you.  There is evidence that if you are a woman, this will happen to you more often than if you are a man, and it's likely to happen to you by both genders.      Interruptions in communications like this happen all the time whether you're in a group offering your opinion or one-on-one sharing a story.  Regardless of the setting, we all find it annoying and rude.  These disruptions of dialogue hamper thought processes, contribute to misunderstandings, and devalue people's input.  So what do we do when they keep happening to us?  A few worthy suggestions can be found in Kathryn Vasel's article,  "Next time someone interrupts you in a meeting, try this" .      But what...