Talk Ain't Cheap

         Everybody loves a good laugh. We feel better when we hear something funny and our anxiety or pain is eased because humor has come as a balm in a tense day. Laughter is beneficial to our emotional and physical health. Well-placed humor works easily in a lot of ways when we are telling stories, but can also come at a huge cost. If we joke about a topic that is sensitive to many, and we do it in a public forum where our intent can be misconstrued by the audience, then we can create a firestorm of frustration for ourselves and them.      A recent example of a humor faux pas involves rapper T.I. and his comments regarding how he checks for his daughter's virginity.  He claimed in a podcast that when his 18-year-old daughter goes to the gynecologist, he tells the doctor to check her hymen to make sure it's still intact--an indication that she is still a virgin. Though this is not an accurate test of virginity, T.I. says...

     From the Christian bible, there is a verse that says in part, "For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks."  Since I'm big on diplomacy and tact, this scripture resonates emphatically with me because it challenges us all to think about what we are hiding in our hearts.  If our words reflect what our heart holds, then is our heart loving and optimistic or is it hateful and negative.  Are we harboring revenge, and its spewing forth in language that destroys another person's reputation?  Or are we hopeful for someone else's success; therefore, our words about them are encouraging and helpful?               In this present day, words have been used to create division among entire groups of people, not just individuals.  We are wielding them like a reckless drunk with a gun in a crowded venue.  We say them without a lot of thought, or if we are thinking, those thought...

     This past week we've heard revelations of some pretty harsh language being used in reference to people of other countries not being allowed into this country.  That language apparently came from the top leader of the most powerful country in the world.  Whether true or not is unclear.  Some in the meeting where it allegedly occurred say they heard the comments clearly.  Others say they don't recall hearing them.  Some refused to comment.  And the accused--the President of the United States--denies it.  Regardless, people were hurt when the claims were made.  People from those countries were distressed upon hearing them, some even brought to tears.  The rejection and denigration cut like a hacksaw.  Many from our own country were appalled and angry.      Recognizing how words impact others calls for the use of emotional intelligence.  This means being smart and intuitive about other people's fe...

     When I saw the movie "Hidden Figures", my first thought was that every student should go see it for all of its inspiring lessons in math, science, and history.  But there was another inspiring lesson that should not be missed and could make all the difference in an individual's success--effective and powerful communications.  Throughout the movie we see women of color speaking up when it counted.  Asking for promotions, stepping in for one another when they felt wronged, and demanding to be "in the room" so they could perform their jobs accurately.  Though the movie highlights the phenomenal math skills of three black women who made a significant contribution to our nation's history at a time of heightened racism and sexism, language and communications were also pertinent skills they mastered.  Communications is an essential skill for success today as well.  Beyond science, numbers, calculations, and historical context, the women...

     We know that social media is a great way for us to be--well- -social .  When done right, these various outlets are a way to build relationships, share information with friends and family across the miles, engage in meaningful discussions about current events and pop culture, share in common interests with "friends" and acquaintances, make announcements, and maybe even do a little business.  But a huge challenge in these social interchanges is actually remaining social and civil in the midst of all this sharing.  What starts off as a way to connect with people we know, and maybe even forge new relationships with people we don't know, can easily lead to a disconnect that may never be repaired.  How does that happen?      Every post defines an individual's beliefs, interests, views, prejudices, and beefs.  Even without intent to be controversial, you can be thrust into the mire of angry disagreement because you have...