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Showing posts from January, 2016

Self Talk: The Ties That Bind

                                Generally, we use the term “the ties that bind” to indicate all the special ways we connect with those we love.  Ties are the conditions, actions, and emotions that draw us to them and keep them part of our lives.  Those ties may be kinship, marriage, trust, friendship, support, history.  They get stretched and twisted and ragged, but they don’t often break.  Our bonds are generally strong.            But there’s another side of this term that’s not as appealing, yet it is the reality of life.  It’s when certain ties bind us to the negatives and shortfalls that are sure to come.  We get connected to behaviors that keep us marking time, and we are unable to release ourselves from them.  We are mentally handcuffed.  Mental handcuffs are limited thoughts that box us in to the status quo whether good or bad, and we’re unable to grow anymore or change.  For example, if I want to start my own business, the mental handcuffs only permit me t

STORYTELLING: My Armageddon Dream

    An effective method of communication is storytelling.  The stories we tell can evoke emotion in the listener whether good or bad.  Stories connect us to our experiences, fears, opinions, and other people.  I want to tell this story only because it was so vivid, bizarre, and emotionally provocative, that I feel I must share it.  It sounds like a scene from a sci-fi flick.  It is dramatic; it's scary; it seems prophetic.  Maybe you'll see symbolism in it.  Maybe you'll feel inclined to offer an interpretation.  Or maybe it'll just be an interesting story to read.  Regardless, I welcome your feedback.     I was awakened at 5:17 a.m. with my heart pounding from what my mind had just played before me like the latest blockbuster from Steven Spielberg.  The details were still rattling around in my psyche as I lay back to review what I'd just witnessed.   It was disturbing and too real, not at all dreamlike.  The occurrences were feasible and connected like a comple

The Three Biggest Coaching Mistakes Managers Make

     Good leaders recognize the importance of making sure they create other good leaders.  Rather than feel insecure that someone else can do as good a job as they do, thus risking their position to that individual, good leaders know that they should create a succession plan for the company.  They should identify those who have an interest and the strengths necessary to be good leaders.  Then the leader needs to transform into a coach, and help those emerging leaders learn the fine skills that will help them to one day be good leaders for someone else.  Leaders who feel threatened generally feel that way because they don't have the confidence that they're doing a good enough job.      Being a coach on the job is hard work just like any other coaching gig.  But much like any other coaching gig, it is necessary.  If you're in a leadership position, it is your duty by definition of the job to lead your people to success.  If success for them is to advance up the org ch