Skip to main content

The Communication That God Hates

     The book of Proverbs describes six things that are detestable to God.  Right off the bat it lists "haughty eyes" (arrogance) and a lying tongue.  Farther down lying is mentioned again in the list so that it looks like there are seven things.  But actually, it is reiterated that God hates lying.  Verse 19 says, "a false witness who pours out lies..."  Apparently, God abhors lying so much it has to be mentioned twice.
     Well, I'm willing to bet that you don't have to be a Christian to detest lying also.  If you've ever been the target of someone's lies or witnessed someone intentionally deceiving someone, you know how hurtful it can be.  I remember when elders used to say if you lie, you steal; if you steal, you kill.  Meaning, one bad action leads to a worse action.  Since I blog about communications, this is one pitfall in our conversations that should not be overlooked.  Is it common sense to say don't lie because it's wrong?  It would seem so, but unfortunately, people do it anyway.  It is estimated that we are lied to as many as 200 times a day.  Several surveys have been conducted asking people how often they lie.  But the numbers often come back low enough that researchers think the participants were lying about lying.
     Of course, people have all sorts of reasons for lying.  Some feel they are justified because they are trying to protect someone else in some way.  Others feel the small ones they tell are insignificant in the grand scheme of things.  Still some feel it's okay because they're telling a partial truth.  Regardless of the reasons why people lie, the fact remains that they do.  We have to find a better way to communicate so that we maintain our integrity.  I'm willing to bet that most of the lies we tell are for selfish reasons.  Unless you don't care if your credibility is busted, you should be trying to protect your reputation as a reliable and trustworthy person.  To be thought otherwise compromises your ability to lead and serve.  Who wants to follow a liar?  Who would trust a liar to deliver on his promises?  Who would believe a gossip or busybody?  Who would trust their heart to a deceiver in a romantic relationship?
     Lying hurts feelings and futures.  Lying destroys reputations and lives.  Lying fuels hate and more lies.  Whether a victim of falsehoods or a perpetrator of them, there is no good thing in lying.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

What It Means to Speak Truth to Power

     "Speaking truth to power" has become a common phrase to use when speaking about truth and/or power in a discussion that encourages courageous discourse on controversial matters.  It is an old phrase coined back in the 1950s by the Quakers and is defined as "a non-violent political tactic, employed by dissidents against the received wisdom or propaganda of governments they regard as oppressive, authoritarian or an ideocracy." (Wikipedia)      I've heard it overused in a lot of ways and not with a clear purpose in its meaning within the context of what was being spoken.  We latch onto certain words and phrases as language goes in and out of style on almost a monthly basis.  In this current generation, there seems to be a new word or phrase created daily and then abandoned when they become overused like worn out sneakers from last year's fall collection.  But words have staying power even if you get tired of hearing the...
Post a Comment
Read more

A Dozen Ways to Tell Your Boss No

     In basically every training class I do on communications, I get people who are reluctant to manage up.  In a few cases, the direct, decisive communicators establish early on in the relationship their boundaries and preferences to their boss.  Those bosses who can respect other people's limits tend to listen without feeling threatened or disrespected.  But generally, workers tend to treat their superiors as demigods and themselves as powerless servants who shouldn't speak up for fear that they'd be punished for having an opinion or for pushing back in areas where they are overwhelmed or uncomfortable.  I get asked, "What do I do when my manager piles all of this work on me, and I can't get it done by his unreasonable deadlines?"  Among other things like how they manage their time, I usually ask if they've had a discussion with their manager about their workload.  The common response:  "Oh noooo, I can't do that.  He's the b...
Post a Comment
Read more

How to Stop Interruptions in Conversations

     So you're sitting in a meeting, and you begin to answer a question that has been directed toward you by your boss.  You get through about half of your response when a colleague jumps in and offers his take and essentially silences you.  There is evidence that if you are a woman, this will happen to you more often than if you are a man, and it's likely to happen to you by both genders.      Interruptions in communications like this happen all the time whether you're in a group offering your opinion or one-on-one sharing a story.  Regardless of the setting, we all find it annoying and rude.  These disruptions of dialogue hamper thought processes, contribute to misunderstandings, and devalue people's input.  So what do we do when they keep happening to us?  A few worthy suggestions can be found in Kathryn Vasel's article,  "Next time someone interrupts you in a meeting, try this" .      But what...
1 comment
Read more